Melrose Place

In case you forgot, hockey is still being played at a professional level in the United States. In fact, on New Year's Day the Friendly Confines will host the Blackhawks and Red Wings (if anyone is interested I'd be willing to explore this more).

But I was deeply troubled when I learned today that Barry Melrose was fired after 14 games as the head coach in Tampa Bay. While I suspect that it was mullet-related, I have to ask: How bad could it have been after only FOURTEEN GAMES!? They were 4-5-1 in their last 10 games. And for those who remember the first Mighty Ducks, that means you're only inches away from being 6-2-1 or 7-3-0. WTF?

As someone who now works in labor relations, I have to say this is ridiculous. What kind of message does this send about job seccurity? Granted, the role of a hockey coach is mystifying to me, but I know that Scotty Bowan was worshipped like a god. What did he do so right and Mr. Party in the Back do so wrong?

Can anyone shed some light on this?

Goodell? Good God!

So, I think now that we've spent some time in the Roger Goodell era of the NFL, it might be the time to take a look at how it's affected both our favorite team, and the league as a whole. (Dav, I don't want to hear about the 'Skins. Ian, you're excused.)

Tagliabue had gotten a pretty bad rep there at the end, and the league itself, as Bengals fans well know, had devolved into day care for millionaire man-children behaving badly. Drunken boating, smoking pot and screwing around with teenagers, establishing and running vast dog-fighting networks in the greater-Atlanta area, eating only McDonalds in the offseason (I'm looking at you, Ocho-Cinco). These are all things that all of us would love to spend our time doing, but we don't. Because it's not appropriate or even moral. I think it's safe to say we left all that behind in college, right? But not NFL superstars.

So in comes the new sheriff, and while things haven't calmed down entirely, there are certainly less reported incidents. But wait, there's bad news.

The bizarre, off-field antics have been muted somewhat, in favor of odd, totalitarian 1984-esque "the rules are the rules and I reserve the right to change the rules at any time without notice" power plays by the upper-management of the sport. Here's a Deadspin post that goes into it slightly. Everyone gets fined for everything, no one knows what's ok and whats verboten, and Hines Ward gets two fines for normal hits, but NOTHING for a career-threatening shot on Bengals rookie LB Keith Rivers. They say the hit was clean, which I think is debatable.

That isn't the only example, obviously. Justin Tuck, Adrian Wilson, and this bizarre episode that's also chronicled in the Deadspin post, wherein Andrew Whitworth and John Henderson are fined equally for an episode that pretty clearly started and ended with Henderson:



So what's the deal? Have we exchanged an ineffectual doormat of a commissioner with a mad despot who rules the league with all the stability of Kim Jong-Il? Or is this just part of the transition from lawless Mad Max wasteland NFL to an Aldous Huxley sports league?

I'm putting the question to the House. I believe that part of the NFL's appeal is its reputation as the "Wild West" among major sports (sorry, hockey), and Goodell is trying to introduce order into a situation which is always going to reject it. Do you guys think we're going to see major changes? Or is Goodell's entire tenure going to be known as the period of arbitrary fines and confused players taking their frustration out on each other?

Sub-question: Has Goodell helped or hurt the Bengals, or were they always destined to collapse like this?